Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Letter to Mah Belly

Dear Belly,

You are one tricksy character. You try to confuse me by slowing, gradually growing bigger over time without me realizing it.

"Have a beer, Christy. You worked hard today and you deserve it!"


"Have some more chocolates. I know it's your favorite. It'll make you feel better about the stress in your life."

In the meantime, Belly quietly laughs an evil belly laugh to itself. He gets bigger and bigger and soon he will take over Christy....Muhahahhaha. MuhAHAHA. Haha. Ha. Ah. Ha. Until...

Christy looks at some old pictures of herself and realizes how much bigger Belly has gotten over time. She also realizes that the scale and her BMI are displaying numbers of evil. Although she was aware of this before and tried to conquer the belly on multiple occasions, she didn't know about Belly's many weaknesses.

The one thing that Christy has learned over time about Belly is that it (he/she?) is very quick to adapt. Feed Belly a few less calories a day and slowly, gradually, without Belly realizing it, Belly will get smaller and smaller and require less food. By writing down how many calories she eats and slowly lowering that number, Christy CAN FOOL THE TRICKSY BELLY!

She must also remember that Belly is very sensitive to any addition of calories to her diet. Belly adapts VERY quickly. Scoundrel.

She likes to fool Belly by drinking peppermint tea as a snack to fill Belly up if she doesn't have many calories left for the day.

Also, Christy is weird...and wears tight pants.  On purpose. Yes, she wear pants that are slightly tight on her so that I can be more conscious of Belly. No offense, Belly, but you are not the first thing on Christy's mind.

Finally, she exercises. Not everyday and she isn't able to keep up with Jillian Michaels perfectly, but at least 3-5 days a week no if, ands, or buts.

SideNote: I haven't lost much weight yet but I think I can hear a tiny, screaming, distant voice coming from Belly. It's saying "Helllllllllp me! Christy is trying to control me......and she knows! She KNOWS!!!" *In a low, Gollumish voice in my head*

So Belly, I was looking at some pictures last night and I realized that you could be much, much smaller and I would be much healthier. It was nice having you there to comfort me but I will now be finding new ways to conquer my stress.

Another Sidenote: B found an old DVD with pictures of my last trip to see family in Ohio on it. I was a skinny minnie. Believe it or not.

I've always been a nerd.

Me on the left...always had a slightly stocky lower body but I'm looking thin!

Side view of me with my grandma, aunt, and second cousin. Look, no double chin!
Here you can even see the belly sticking out. That was my favorite pair of jeans. I still have those. Size 8. *Sigh*

See, Belly, you can be thin and healthy. Now make it easier for Christy and stop with the sweets and fast food cravings, K?

Best Regards,


P.S. We are out of Dove dark chocolates and cookies so don't even think about it.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey Christy. :) My husband and I tried Dragonfly last night on your recommendation. As a self-proclaimed foodie snob, you should do yourself a favor and check out Amura. I don't think you'll be disappointed. Good luck with the diet, grad-school etc. Take care!