My Friendship Story

These past few weeks I've thought a lot about my friends. I've noticed that sadly most of my closest friends are peppered all around the country and I miss them so much! I've also noticed that the friends I have that do live in Orlando plan to or hope to, move as soon as possible. *Ugly crying*

A few weeks ago my friend Sara visited from New Mexico. Her grandmother, who I once visited with Sara in South Florida, passed away. Her grandmother on her mom's side was a Jewish lady from Brooklyn while her grandmother on her dad's side was a Southern Baptist from Texas....and this combination of families apparently results in a super, awesome Sara. I was very happy to get a few hours with Sarah but not happy that she had to fly in for her dear grandmother's funeral.

I met Sara through my ex-boyfriend in high school. We're talkin circa 2002 here. Both of them were on their separate schools' quiz bowl teams (although Sara's was called "Brain Bowl"). I immediately hit it off with Sara. She was one of the most confident, intelligent, open-minded, and silliest people I've ever met. Sara has always had a strong love for math and science (my weaker subjects) and she is mad good at both subjects. We both wanted to go to the University of Florida, but were both rejected our senior year. She decided to take gen ed requirements for her physics major at a community college while I decided to attend UCF and attempt to transfer to UF. I went on a tour of the University of Florida my senior year of high school and got my first Gator T-shirt. After several unsuccessful attempts to transfer I got mad at Florida and decided to give my shirt to Sara since she was able to transfer before I did. I completely forgot about that shirt until I saw it on her bed when I visited! Boy, I have grown out of that shirt big time.

After Sarah double majored in math and physics at UF (whew!), she decided that she wanted to be a patent lawyer and applied to several law schools in California where she had moved to be closer to her boyfriend at the time. Just like me, she didn't get into graduate school the first time she applied and instead applied to a nearby program  for Materials Engineering. Like me, she felt that her second choice career was a little more practical in today's world than her first option...and also that it would be a better fit for her. Now she is kicking butt and taking names, doing research and taking elective classes like "General Relativity" just because she thought it sounded interesting. Since we've been friends she's lived in Gainesville, Florida, California, and New Mexico and she's also been through several relationships in that time...many of which we spent a lot of time on  the phone dissecting. We have the type of friendship where no matter where we are in our lives or how long it's been since we've last spoken, we can pick up right where we once left off. And there have been tons of ups and downs in both our lives. It's a huge blessing to have someone who has known you forever as a constant.

Now, for the silliness that bides us. Sara's parents have these 2 huge golden retrievers with gigantic heads. I wish I knew what breed they are but their heads are the size of a horse. Whenever see those dogs I just can't. stop. staring. at. their. heads!! After taking a few pictures we decided it would be fun to emulate the dogs play-fighting in an action shot.

Don't judge. We're biting and hitting each other in mid-air. We're weird and proud.

I drove home quite a ways in the dark the night I went to see her, but it was totally worth it. She never ceases to inspire and amaze me with her hard work and confidence. That, and I feel totally comfortable around her.

This week, I decided I may devote each day to a small summary of one of my closest friends (as long as they allow it). For some reason, all of my friends are completely different... I fear if I were to put them all in the same room at once anarchy might break out and they might kill each other. This could present some friction at my wedding....but hopefully not because they love me and want me to have an awesome wedding. I get along with all of them on an individual basis and value their different character traits.

After I spend the proper amount of time singing the praises of my friends, I think I will have to do a post on my biggest difficulty right now. Because most of my friends are moving away or do not live here and because B and I will be buying I house here in Orlando, I need to expand my social circle to remain sane and happy. It's been hard for B and I to meet new people here and we are both busy with work a lot of the time. So far, I plan on attending the Reddit Orlando meetup group. I hope to meet all kinds of interesting people there. Other than that, I'm still brainstorming. Any suggestions? Prospects are looking a bit grim at the moment.

I Finally Found Something That Works!

On the show "Intervention", they say that cocaine addicts relapse seven times before they quit using completely. I feel the same way about losing weight. Except it's harder to quit, because you can never stop "using" completely. In the past I've tried the Adkins diet, exercising six days a week, the Triangle Diet, and South Beach diet. The only one that I've actually had success with in the past was South Beach diet. But....there were several problems with how I was doing it at the time. First, I was in post-bac and way too stressed with schoolwork to focus on a diet. Actually, it would have been easier to focus on, if I had known about the quick and easy foods you can eat. Recently, my patient's wife, who is a huge South Beacher gave me lots of tips and showed me how to make it easy and realistic. So far, I've lot 15 pounds and while I feel like I still have several challenging aspects to work on, I feel totally confident that I can reach my goals!

Honestly,if you ever plan on doing the South Beach diet, it would behoove you to buy the South Beach diet book so that you can learn about carbohydrates and fiber and how your body breaks down food. But, if you have a basic understanding of the South Beach Diet the next best, quick and easy thing I would recommend doing is buying this small, around-5-bucks-book called, The South Beach Diet Good Carbs Bad Carbs Guide. It's basically a list of different types of food with the glycemic index and whether each food is "good", "bad", or "use sparingly".  For instance, I hardly ever touch white flour bread anymore but I still eat delicious rye bread because of the lower glycemic index. I love this book because it's a quick and easy reference.

In the first phase of South Beach, you only eat vegetables, meat, cheese, and eggs. No fruit, alcohol, or bread. I did this with a few slight modifications. I had one piece of Arnold Real Jewish Seedless Thin Sliced Rye Bread a day. It only has 10 carbohydrates per piece and 55 calories. Also,  a couples times I accidentally ate Old Fashioned Oatmeal which is not allowed until phase 2 because only a half cup of it has 27 grams of carbohydrates! Opps. I had coffee and diet drinks...hey, a girl's got to live! I had to remember to read nutrition facts for carbs on everything. The great thing about phase one is that it only lasts two weeks and you eat until you are no longer hungry. No carb or calorie counting just aiming for low carb. What it does is even out your blood sugar and fixes your insulin levels until you no longer crave things anymore. I don't crave chocolate like I used to or pasta, bread, or sweet treats. Here are some of the easy and quick foods that I ate:


Every morning for breakfast in phase 1, I would have some type of eggs. Eggbeaters with some cheddar cheese grated on top if I was in a hurry or an elaborate omelet on weekends. I'd have 2 slices of turkey bacon, Spicy hot V8, and if I had time coffee with 2 splendas and no cream (not a cream fan anyways). Yes, eggs are high in cholesterol but they also have the good kind of protein and lots of amino acids...and they fill you up. I know what you are thinking about cheese...high in fat. South Beach recommends that you eat low-fat cheese. However, the South Beach book also tells you that if you eat "low-fat" foods the number of carbohydrates go up. So, I ate regular cheese. After 2 weeks, I was definitely sick of eggs but I lost 10 pounds so it was worth it.

For a morning snack I would have a string cheese if I was hungry. For lunch, I would have a piece of the melba bread toasted with tuna salad on top. I put regular Hellman's mayonnaise, white onions, a little sweet relish, and mustard into the tuna salad. I learned to have lots of fun with condiments but stayed away from ketchup because of the high glycemic index. I sometimes had a small grilled cheese with one slice of bread or a chef salad with veggies, meats, and cheeses. If I could stand to have another egg I'd have an egg salad sandwich. Everyday for "lunch dessert" I would have sugarfree jello with a couple tablespoons of Lite Cool Whip on top because it filled me up and cured my sweet tooth.

After I got home from work I would drink Crystal Bay because it's carbonated, sweet, and yummy. If I was hungry I might have celery with Smuckers Natural Peanut butter, which has less sugar than regular peanut butter.

For dinner, I would have whatever meat we were having and load up on the veggies on the side. I love salads, baked asparagus with olive oil, and sauteed veggies. For dessert, I would have breakstone's low fat cottage cheese with 1 splenda and then either put cut up grapes or a few sliced almonds on top. You can also add vanilla extract and it tastes like vanilla ice cream (sorta). I liked to sprinkle cinnamon on it as well. If I was desperate for a chocolate fix I would have a fudgsicle with no sugar added.

I love focusing on what I can eat and not what I can't eat and simplifying what I eat...because I  work and don't have any time to cook up an elaborate meal everyday.

Now that I'm in phase 2 breakfast is much more interesting. I'll have smuckers peanut butter on melba bread with an apple, a thin sliced 100% whole wheat bagel with cream cheese, old fashioned oatmeal with splenda and cinnamon, or back to my regular eggs. I started sucking on coffee and chocolate favored Nips to cure my sweet tooth. Everything else is sort of the same except I count calories  on livestrong now since I have more liberties in my diet ,"cheat" more often, and try to get to the gym more. I'll have a glass of Merlot or a light beer occasionally. Weightloss is much slower in this phase and I find that you are constantly tweaking your diet to see what works.  If 3 slices of bread a day make you gain a pound over a week, you cut it down to 2 slices the next week.

Although I've lost 15 pounds, I still have 35 pounds left to go. I'm still overweight, but I feel like I can stick with this because I'm satisfied and not hungry. There are still a few challenging things that I am working on. When I'm hormonal, emotional, or overly tired I tend to stray from my diet. Recently, it was that time of the month...the next week was Easter, I worked an overnight shift, and then I got into a huge argument with a friend. So, I decided I have to always have satisfying, easy access things in my refrigerator for those occasions. Next time of the month, I will definitely be prepared and have a stocked kitchen.

I absolutely love this blog Slimming Down for the Gown, because she documents her weight on the blog and  shows pictures of what her body looks like after every ten pounds of weightloss. She is also engaged and trying to look fab on her wedding day just like me. I decided I will not post pictures of my body on my blog. I'm a pretty transparent person and would do the same thing as her but I'm worried I will end up as the "before" picture on a diet website somewhere. So I decided that I will post pictures of the next best thing. My chin. My chin is one of the best indicators of how fat I am.

Before: Check out that quadruple chin, baby yeah!

After: More of a double chin now....less scary!

I'm a tall girl, 5'8, and I've never been a small person.I have large, German thighs and a curvy figure. In middle school, this boy in my math class used to call me an Amazonian. In undergraduate school, I gained about 20-25 pound. I was no longer in sports like cross country and swimming like I was in high school and I spent most a lot of time studying and not moving. In post-bac, I partied a little too hard on the weekends and gained another 25 pounds. I'm now engaged and I'm ready to be happy with my body again and look amazing on my wedding day. I'm so close to going down one dress size! Even though I lost 15 pounds, I'm a pear and most of the weight is on my lower half (badunka dunk..) so I still can't squeeze my butt into a lower-sized jean. I should be able to after I lose another 5-10 pounds. I'm so ready and I can't wait to make it to the gym tomorrow morning!

Writing this entry has allowed me to reflect on my progress and look forward to more weight loss. I feel like I just set the reset button. 

Why I Love My Job

As some of you might already know my biggest career aspiration is to be a Physician Assistant, but I'm working as a Certified Nursing Assistant until I can take the next step in my career path. At first, my ego had a really hard time accepting the fact that while I'm extremely educated I'm working in a field where most workers have only a high school diploma and some vocational training.  My friends and fiancée have helped me to see the light these past few months.

One day, B said to me, "I could never do what you do at your job". Initially, I was offended and thought he meant that he would refuse to work in a role that sometimes involves bodily functions and spending hours being patient with the elderly. I asked him what he meant by that later on via text and he said, "I couldn't do your job because I couldn't. It takes an insanely strong person to do what you do. It takes someone who not only has a strong sense of self, but also the ability to be completely selfless for others."

Then, I melted. I knew that when he texted me, he was thinking of his dad who died of brain cancer just over a year ago. I think his dad didn't feel comfortable with his future of daughter-in-law taking care of him like a CNA would, so I really didn't get the chance to use my CNA skills on him. I use them all the time now though  and lots of sweet elderly people that need some extra help.

Another day, I was complaining to my friend about the low-pay, lack of benefits etc. and while she was commiserating with me and lamenting over how much the elderly are overlooked and mistreated in our society, she said, "I really hope there are a lot of Christys around when I get to be an frail, old lady." That comment totally made my day, and I haven't let my ego get in the way since then.

Besides, I love my day-to-day routine. I work Monday through Friday with an elderly couple in their home. The man I work for has Parkinson's and his wife is unable to help him get around by herself on days when "he isn't navigating" as she puts it (Isn't that a nice way to put it?). What that means, for those who might need clarification, is that he isn't always able to control his muscles and it can be very debilitating at times. Besides physical assists, I remind him to take his medication every 2 hours around the clock, help him make it to doctor appointments, help him with a shower or a bed bath, let the dog out, let the dog in, help prepare lunch, clean up some around the house, make sure that the patient is safe at all times, cheer him up as much as possible, and spend a lot of time talking with his wife who is still adjusting to the changes in her husband's health. Since she is now handling everything to do with their insurance, bills, etc.so I try to give her advice on how to navigate insurance since I used to work in the field, by at least pointing her in the right direction. I explained the Medicare gap for prescription coverage to her and no elderly person should ever have to try and understand that mess...most young people don't even get it!

But I digress, I totally love this couple.

The patient with Parkinson's has always been extremely nice to me no matter how frustrated he can sometimes get. He treats me like he would a daughter. His wife is my South Beach diet buddy and she and I are always talking about food...recipes, how to make things low-carb, how we cook things.....I LOVE it. Heck, I've lost 15 pounds so far (blog post on that later). She also has the cutest phrases that she says that just make me giggle. She likes to say things like "my husband hasn't eaten that in a Coon's age" and she likes the word "liable".  As in, "if you eat that kind of bread, you're liable to put on weight". That's kind of a  bad example but it's so adorable and southerny when she says it.

Also, I admire their relationship. She treats him with respect even though she is a lot more mentally astute than he is at this point and tries really hard not to embarrass him in anyway. He also gets frustrated with not being able to do things like he used to but seems to understand that without his wife around he would be in big trouble.

They are quite religious and always do a blessing everyday before eating lunch. One time when their close church friends came over to eat and spend time with them, their friends thanked God for me in their blessing. It was so sweet of them....they treated me like I was my patient's guardian angel. Totally brought a tear to my eye.

 I love how rewarding this job is spiritually and emotionally. I love the patient interaction and occasionally  learning new things.  I've learned about how to put hearing aids in (they don't teach you that in CNA school, go figure), how to use a nebulizer, the best way to insert a suppository (TMI?, we nurses aren't shy...), how to move a patient with stiff muscles, how to check blood sugar, and the list goes on. However, the biggest downfall this job has is that I don't get to use my mind as much as I would like. I'm going to be taking nutrition online and applying to nursing school soon though so that will make me more mentally active and it will be a nice change of pace.

I also pick up shifts when other patients need a CNA. I've worked in nursing homes and hospitals. I've worked with tons of patients with Alzheimer's and several in hospice care. I've done two 12 hour overnight shifts.These jobs that I pick up is where I learn the most new things because I get to work with a variety of patients in different settings.

I love the work I do and can see myself becoming a nurse and then maybe one day becoming a Nursing Practitioner instead  of PA....I'm really not sure which path I would like better at this point. What I know for sure is, if I become a nurse I will have no problem at all spending lots of time with the elderly and I will probably even love it.

When it comes down to it, old people are cool cats.

Am I talking like one? That makes me cool too.

Stuck on repeat

B didn't kill me for murdering his laptop! Luckily, we have a warranty and have finally sent in the laptop for a replacement. I agreed to purchase our next warrenty since I kill all machines ever. It took a couple weeks for us to send it in because B has been working a ton of hours lately due to some changes at his work. I would have done it myself except I'm intimidated by exterior harddrives and afraid I would forget to take off something important. So, it looks like it will be at least another week before I have a better blogging machine.

I'm currently blogging from an IPad and I hate it! First off, B won't let me use a blogging app because all his information is programmed into all the applications. Although with our twitter app they allow you to have two separate accouts on one application. Not the case with blogging apps. Secondly, I don't have access to any of my pictures on here. Typing on the IPad is actually fun and doesn't take too long to get used to, but moving the cursor sucks...unless I'm doing it wrong and fat fingering it.

Aside from technology, a lot has been going on. We've been househunting with our realtor for the past few weeks. We were getting closer and closer to finding our perfect, raise our children, and live in for 20 or 30 years house. We had finally narrowed down what area to live in and the exact features we want for our house. We even went to a broker and got prequalified for a home loan. This weekend though everything changed. B found out that the wedding gift that we were expecting to receive is not going to be as large as we initially thought. Also, we found out that our realtor (my future mother in law's best friend), my future MIL, and our financial advisor expect us to have three months of reserved money for living expenses in our account after we move. Bleeeeeh!

OK, I understand why this is a good idea. Most people in financial crises moved to a new house with a pricey mortgage and then all of the sudden got laid off. It's just that the idea of having a down payment for a house and that much money saved up just seems impossible to me right now. I really enjoy the job I have now but it doesn't pay a lot and I'm not willing to get a new job until I can actually have a role I would like in the medical field. B is working his butt off but the more money he makes, the more money gets taken out of his paycheck for taxes, Etc. We can save more money but it takes a long time.

So, the best options that we've thought of are talking to another broker and seeing if we qualify for first time homebuyers down payment assistance programs. The first broker we talked to didn't even bring these programs up so our realtor referred us to a new broker who will see if we qualify. The next thing we've thought of is moving to a better rental home while we continue to save money. We're meeting with the broker this Thursday and should find out more soon.

Honestly, all of this depresses me. We both work so hard and are more responsible with our money than most of our friends. I'm ready for a house and I'm ready to be done with school (that's a whole other story) because I'm ready to get married and have kids. I know we have to do certaint things to make sure we bring our children (God-willing) into a stable, happy, secure environment, but I'm just so stinking sick of living for tomorrow. I work, come home, do chores, look at houses etc. and read blogs about families and their adorable children ...then have massive baby fever. My girlfriend says it's just hormones but I think it's definitely more than that. I'm in a place in my life where I'm ready to live for someone other than just myself. Also, B and I have been together for eight years now and have so much love to give. I think B will make an excellent father and spoil our kids like mad.

This was never meant to be a baby post but at the core of all this money jibber jabber is what we think should happen before we have kids...getting married and buying a house, but really there is so much more to it than that. I want to be able to afford the basic necessities and fulfill the first levels of Maslow's hierarchy of needs for my kids, but my heart is ready to love a child right now.

I guess we have to be patient and maturely weigh our options.

Or.....we could be flippant hippies...thats more our style anyway. Except, this is too important to me. Wah.

With my Tail Betwixt my Legs

Father, I come before you today to repent my many sins. The burden is just too much to bare. I can no longer live a lie. I'm a technology serial killer and I have nowhere to hide. Screeech, screech, screeeeeeech!

There is nothing I love more than curling up with a nice, hot cup of coffee and surfering the net. This morning I was minding my own business doing my morning ritual then I go to scratch my elbow and all of the sudden coffee is in a pool on the keyboard. It all happened so fast. As soon as coffee or a snack hits the keyboard (not that this has happened before...*weeps*) I grab the nearest tissues and attempt to recesitate. I apply direct pressure to the wound, turn the injured area over to drain the wound, and allow my beloved machine to rest in acoma while I pray and repent. Immediately, I regret my clumsy carelessness.

Sidenote: I really do have a lot of respect for technology. More like an unhealthy obsession. I manage my finances online, pay my bills, livestrong, tweet, email mortgage brokers, look at houses on realtor.com, and check FB (facebook for you cool people out there..I rarely go on facebook despite my knowledge of the hip lingo). Why I'm so quick to grab the nearest knife and twist it into the heart of any nearby technology is something I have yet to fully understand about myself.

The worst part of all of this is that the laptop I use technically belongs to my fiancee. He mostly uses his new Ipad 2 for leisure and his desktop for work. I've never actually owned a laptop that I could technically call my own (gee, I wonder why?). How is it possible that a tech savy web designer like B ends up with The Technology Serial Killer of Orange County, Florida? That is, if we're still engaged after he finds out about the murder of his beloved child.

Honestly, I haven't blogged for so long because I've been begging B to redesign my blog. It needs a major makeover to up my blogging motivation. After this morning's little transgression, I've decided to go ahead and keep blogging for several reasons. First, I know I'm going to be in the slammer for at least six months after today. I can only see B forgiving me if I save up enough money to buy myself a cheap laptop with an expensive warrenty and B his deam MacBook Air.  Also, after he finds out (hopefully not by reading this...Oh God...) I will be living an episode of True Life: The Life of a Vagabond Computer User. I'll probably only use his desktop when he isn't working of have to go to the library downtown, fight for a parking spot (joy), and fist bump with the other vagabonds that hang out downtown. Or worse yet, power on at my employer's where it takes two hours to load while I try not to scream in agony. Oh yeah, and I'm taking nutrition online this summer. I need a miracle...live baby, live!

I really don't blame B at all for being POed at me. I've killed numerous cell phones and now 3 laptops if this one doesn't come to. I'm dangerous and frankly, shouldn't be allowed out of the house (except that I need to earn money to bail my @$$ out). You can only forgive so many times. I need some sort of 12 Step Program: Tech Serial Murders Anonymous (TSMA), Tech Abusers Take Action (TATA), Tech Offenders Obtain Trust (TOOT), or maybe just You Can't Trust This B (YCTB). I can't change the clumsiness that resides so innately in me, but I have to learn to work around it. I'm going to go hide in a corner with my tail betwixt my legs now. And cry.

P.S. I really need to keep a handheld tape recorder in my car because I write blog entries in my head while I'm switching between Busta Rhymes and The Farmers Daughter on the radio. Maybe I should just quit the whole coffee thing. It seems to have multiple repurcussions..including spillage and manic blog posts.

P.S.S. I think B might read this...and reach through the internet and choke me..but I deserve it.

P.S.S.S. I shouldn't even be posting this right now.

P.S.S.S.S. Sorry for all the typos I was on a work computer while my patient took a nap.

My First Mini Vlog

I'm trying out my fiancée's new Ipad 2 and I definitely need more practice. Don't judge!

Engagement Party Mock-up

I've started planning our engagement party for ourselves and families. It's kind of like practice for planning the wedding. I've emailed 3 vendors so far but I'm still waiting to hear back from 2. I'm still waiting for pricing from the first vendor but at least I got past her sales pitch for what I don't want. Perhaps, I will have to call and actually speak to someone..oh no! I'll give it a few days though.

Here's a little summary on what I would like our engagement party to be like.

Time of year: October 2011 on a Sunday preferably (football season is priority!)

Guests: Approximately 23-25 (close family and friends)

Elements:

Cupcake Tower

Photo from here

I have a long list of vendors for these. Does anyone have any reviews of these places or can recommend some other place in Orlando? We are foodies so we need awesome cupcakes!

CupCake Crazy
Delish NY Bakery
Cupcake Jubilee
Bees Knees Sweet Treats

Champagne/Signature Drink

Photo Credit

As for a signature drink, I'm completely stumped. We both like beer. My fiancée and liquor don't mix well but I like martinis, long islands, margaritas....all kinds of girly, strong drinks. Maybe we'll serve beer in fancy glasses...but I still want girly!

Table Centerpiece/Flowers for Appetizer Table

Photo Credit

I have fallen completely head over heels in love with deep red carnations and I plan to include them in both the wedding and engagement party. They are so gorgeous and take my breath away.


Delicious Appetizers


I believe this element will depend on the venue. Right? Help me out, people.
Note: Also, coffee from Starbucks because that is where we had our first date.

Sundress to go with my Engagement ring (which still needs to be reset)

I can't decide on a final dress but here is one that I like from www.modcloth.com

Photo Credit

Music


Just borrowing an Ipod would be fine or speaker system at the venue with fun, romantic songs. I'll post more when I get to that part of the planning. Our song is "The Game of Love" by Michelle Branch  featuring Santana.

Invites
I'm leaving this up to my designer fiancée but I think we should save him some stress and just purchase these premade. I'm afraid to pick one out without his assistance. This is what happens when you are engaged to a designer.


So there are the bare-bones. I can't wait for this to take shape! I'm thrilled and excited to celebrate our relationship after 8 years of dating. Feel free to make suggestions or give me advice as I've never done this before.